We’ve all heard the phrase about making assumptions—but, there’s a lot of truth to it. When you assume, you’re accepting the status quo and giving away your power. When you begin asking questions, you start to find answers, and perhaps more than that. You have to ask in order to receive!

“If you do not ask, you will not get what you want! Women often think that if they do a good job that they will be compensated accordingly, which is often not going to happen.” ~Dr. Becky Paneitz read more about Dr. Paneitz’s Unreasonable Request here

Asking for what you want sounds easy, but there is a lot of effort that comes with it. To begin understanding your worth, confidence is key. One can’t necessarily get what they ask for if they’re not sure that they deserve it. Knowing your value puts you in a place to leverage it and make a real difference in the lives of others—and to further your own success in every aspect of life.

“Don’t live down to expectations. Go out there and do something remarkable.” ~Wendy Wasserstein

Asking for what you want also requires you to do your homework! If you’re going to ask for something (a raise, a loan, business tips, mentorship, etc.), you need to know who would fit your needs best, and you need to know if their resources can match your needs! This can require some deeper involvement, planning and negotiation skills. Always do your research. The more you know about the subject of your request, the more others will take you seriously. Deeper knowledge of your request and what it takes will also feed your confidence and put you in a better position for ultimate success.

Here are some tips to help you Take Back Your Power and begin asking for what you deserve:

  1. Outline what it is you mean to address. What’s bugging you? Do you feel that you deserve a raise at work? Do you feel that you’re doing too much of the household chores at home? Identify areas that could use some conversation with others.
  2. Do your research on the request. If there is any data to back up your statements, have it handy! Understand the position the other person is in, and what they can do to help you.
  3. Write down a few ways you would feel comfortable addressing said situation. Bring it up over coffee? Maybe at lunch? Start with stating how you feel— feelings are ALWAYS valid. So, even if the request is somehow denied, the other person can still address your feelings.
  4. Be confident! If nothing else, confidence is respectable and can make all the difference in any situation! Remember, you’re not asking for anything that you don’t deserve.
  5. The worst they can say is “No,” so ask away!

“I taught myself confidence. When I’d walk into a room and feel scared to death, I’d tell myself, ‘I’m not afraid of anybody.’ And people believed me. You’ve got to teach yourself to take over the world.” ~Priyanka Chopra

When you know your value, understand what your request will take, and have the confidence to ask for what you deserve, the answers to your questions may surprise you— you never know until you ask!